Read and Respond

When I shuffle through my Facebook feed every day, I inevitably run into a post -- or three or ten -- that makes me want to slam my face on my desk.

Sometimes it's because I strongly disagree. Sometimes it's because I agree strongly but am frustrated with the way the thought was expressed. A few times lately it's because I've seen people I really like picking fights with each other, sometimes directly, sometimes with subtle, indirect jabs that are still so well-placed. (And yeah, sometimes it's also because I'm friends with my teenage cousins, and most of what they say is like a secret code to me, and that makes me feel old.)

Day after day, I keep running into these posts and news stories and ideas that make me want to respond, but the idea of responding makes me feel like a scared little rabbit with a too-small cage and a too-fast heartbeat. (Unless they're sleeping, I imagine that rabbits have a running commentary in their heads something along the lines of "Ohgoshohgoshohgoshohnoohcrapohgosh...")

Part of me feels like a wuss for never, or at least very rarely, responding. When I do, it's usually to request clarification, to make a joke, or to offer up something along the lines of "this is just my personal point of view, but ..."  Something very safe. Something couched in fluff. Something that keeps the little rabbit in the too-small cage because at least that's better than the too-big world.

On the occasion I do insert my argument, I usually spend way too much time afterward worrying what people will say in response.

I've had a few conversations with people lately about how important it is to speak one's own mind -- and found myself sitting on my opinions in those very conversations.

In one way that ticks me off at myself -- aren't my opinions valuable? Shouldn't I be able to express the things I wrestle with and ponder and pray about and wake up in the dead of night and worry over? But the issue isn't whether I can, it's whether I should.

Not "should" as in "this is an important topic that should be discussed!" Should as in "will discussing this particular topic in this place, in this manner, with these people, be beneficial to all involved?" 

Consider the exhortation of James the Just: "Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath." (James 1:19, for you who like to look stuff up)

I've been trying to be deliberate about these things because for all the times I've spoken my mind and been pleased, I've run my mouth and gotten myself in trouble.

Fact is, I value my friendships more than my opinions, and I won't let the latter do unnecessary damage to the former. So if you're wondering why I'm staying out of certain debates, there ya go.

But because I feel like this was a bit of a dreary and rambling post, let's wrap up topic on which I will always, always, always enter the discussion: Reading.

Five Notes About Reading This Week:

1. I will never, ever get tired of doing funny voices for the characters in my kids' books. My mom did it for me, I do it for them. Favorite book to read aloud lately: Karma Wilson's "Bear Snores On." 

2. Hunger Games movie is out on Friday!!!. Yes, I'm on that bandwagon, and yes I'll be there opening night (though not at midnight; I'm no spring chicken) --  though hoping it turns out more Harry Potter 6, less Harry Potter 1, in terms of nerdy book-to-movie adaptations.

3. I've never been a big-time C.S. Lewis devotee beyond the Narnia books, but I'm responsible for teaching my five little private schoolers Till We Have Faces in a few weeks. I'm finding Lewis' last novel is giving me much to think about, question, and love -- mark of a dang good book. Please read it so we can talk about it.

4. Added a new magazine to my weekly/monthly mess of magazines (I loooove magaziiiines): Relevant. It's a progressive Christian magazine and is waaaaay too hip for me (they keep talking about bands I've never heard of! It's like working at my college radio station all over again!) but I'm excited to add it to my reading list and see where it takes me.

5. But the best reading so far this week wasn't me. It was my Henry, who is amazing us with his emerging mad reading skillz. (Really not trying to brag here -- but the boy is 3!) 

He just woke up and came and interrupted the writing of this blog post (and is driving a fire truck over my typing hands at the moment), and asked if I'd write him a secret message to read, like I often do when he is curious about my writing on the computer.

So I wrote, and he read, "I love Henry! He is a good and funny boy."

And that's something I'm more than happy to talk about.